Allie's Grave

We have been waiting for 3 months for Allie's headstone to arrive. Not having her headstone was hard for me. I think it was because you could see where her little grave had been dug up. Looking at yellow grass instead of green grass. Nothing marking she had been buried there. It's almost a sense of closure now seeing her grave marked.

We found out on Monday that it was placed and as soon as Benton arrived home from work we were in the car driving to see her. It of course brought tears to my eyes. It turned out beautiful.

 

 

After we left I felt so sad. We decided that we needed to place some things at her grave to brighten it up. I immediately went to Michael's to search for the perfect flowers. I personally am not a fake flower girl but when I saw this sparkly butterfly I thought of our sweet Allie. She is the purest thing I know, so I bought some white flowers to go along with it. I think it turned out nice and I am so glad she has them to sit at her grave with her.

 

 

 

 

My heart still feels shattered but hopefully I can start putting it back together. I know that's what Allie would want. I've just never dealt with so much sadness. Love you sweet baby girl.

Thanksgiving Day

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. I love to be reminded what I am thankful for as well as eating lots of good food. We had Thanksgiving this year at my parents house with my sister & her family and a few of our cousins. It was nice spending time with family and just relaxing. Here's some pictures from our day.

 

 

 

 

The Hansen Family

 

My mom did a great job on cooking all the food, it was delicious!

 

 

 

Afterwards I came home, put the kids to bed and met up with my friend Cortney and went Black Friday shopping from 10pm-2:30am. The lines were crazy but we had a good time. We decided shopping in the middle of the night kinda makes people crazy and us a little hyper. Glad we went because we found some fun things! Hope you all enjoyed your Thanksgiving with your families!

3 Months old!

Addison is now 3 months old. She is the best baby. I couldn't ask for a sweeter baby than she is. She weighs 9lbs exactly. This past week she started fitting in her 0-3 month size clothing, it's kinda sad she's getting bigger. And she still fits in newborn diapers but I'm thinking as soon as we are done with the ones we have it's time for her to be in size 1.

Addison is the best sleeper. She goes to bed about 8pm and wakes up once about 3 or 4am then goes right back to sleep and wakes up around 7:30 to eat again. She loves her sleep.

She is such a fun addition to our family. We are so grateful that she is healthy and has been able to be apart of our family. We know Allie is watching over us and keeping her twin safe.

Addie looks like she has red hair. We've thought that since the day her and Allie were born. We were surprised to have 2 redheads. Their eyebrows are the same color so it'll be interesting to see if the color stays or turns into a brunette.

 

We love her chubby cheeks, they are from the Carnahan side of the family.

 

Addie has the longest eyelashes. Anyone seen Emperor's New Groove? Addie's remind me of Yzma's who has the longest eyelashes that curl right up to her eyebrows, they are amazing! That's Addie all the way. She is one lucky girl!

 

Growing up my parents referred to me as the pink and white baby. Addison definitely has my skin coloring, she is the new pink and white baby.

 

We love you Addie!

DIY Curtains

On Halloween night while walking home we noticed that you can see right into our kitchen from our backyard since we didn't have any drapes covering our sliding glass doors. Obviously we don't want just anyone being able to see into our house, so it became my project to find a solution.

We soon realized why there were never any drapes on this window. Our cupboards go right next to the window and they go almost to the ceiling and our drawers pull out. So we had to put the curtain rod higher than normal which then was a problem finding drapes that were long enough for our window. I bought some but they didn't work, so Aimee (my sissy in law) suggested we make some ourselves. So 2 weeks ago we found the perfect fabric which was a task in itself. Then yesterday we got together and made them. It took us a good 5 hours. We were both so pleased with our work because to us they look professional ;)

I got home last night and hung them up and you wouldn't believe it....I measured my window WRONG! Yep, my heart almost stopped working. I was so sad. I tried calling Aimee in horror at my mistake but unfortunately she didn't answer. I was so disappointed in myself, I even dreamed about my mistake last night. Thankfully she called me this morning with a solution...drapery clips! My mom and I went to Joann's and I came home and put them on my drapes and it worked, they are now the perfect length! I couldn't be happier.

The fabric...

 

We even put a liner on the back! Here's a picture of the bottom and backside of the drapes...

 

The top with the clips...

 

And the finished product...

 

 

 

I LOVE them! Thanks Aimee, I had a blast sewing them with you. I couldn't have done it without your help. LOVE YOU SO MUCH!

3 weeks later

My Bell's Palsy has finally slowly started to disappear after 3 weeks. I can't even imagine having it for 6 months or so like a lot of people have it. I am now so grateful that half of my face is no longer paralyzed.

I am thankful...
~that I can shower without having soap/shampoo go into my eye because my eye wouldn't shut.
~for my full smile instead of just one side.
~my face no longer feels like I have been punched on the left side of my face. It was so tender and felt bruised all day long.
~to be able to close my eye and not have to wear tape to close my eye shut each night when I went to bed.
~to talk normal. I couldn't say certain letters because half of my mouth didn't move.
~that I am no longer drooling while I eat or drink.
~to not feel self conscious when I laughed or smiled.

***Warning, not a very cute picture of me*** I'm sure you can tell what side of my face is paralyzed. But here's a picture of me smiling with Bell's Palsy so you know what it looks like...

 

And now it's slowly coming back to where both sides of my face somewhat match!

 

I couldn't imagine having it longer than I did. It was hard going out in public because I didn't feel comfortable smiling, so when I went out in public I felt ornery because I didn't smile. I must say I was in a darker place with the Bell's Palsy, I felt like giving up. But thankfully I don't have to feel that way any longer and hopefully I won't have to feel that way ever again!

Then & Now

Aimee gave me this pink hat in the photos below when I had Cambree. So I of course had to do a mini photo shoot of Addison wearing it as well. Just know Aimee took Cambree's pictures of her wearing the hat so they were professionally taken. The ones of Addison I took myself but I think they both look equally cute in this big pink flowered hat!

Miss Cambree

 

 

 

Miss Addison

 

 

 

Love my sweethearts!